angry mama

"My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires."--James 1:19-20.

Lewis turned one year-old today! It's really hard to believe that his first year of life is over. He is no longer an infant, even a baby. Though he's not really toddling, I'm sure he's moved into that phase of life. He, at the very least, desperately desires to be independent and walk on his own. Still, with his growth comes more moods and preferences. I'm sad to say that his expression of these new preferences lately has resulted in frustration and anger on my part--thus these verses from James to help me refocus.

This time last year I was excited about being a new mom and desperately wanting to conquer breastfeeding and bring my baby home. Now, when Lewis takes what seem to be steps back (refusing to feed himself or eat veggies he's happily eaten for up to 6 months) it is hard for me to deal with. Without taking a breath and stepping back to think, my anger can quickly overcome me. And I can certainly agree with James that anger does not bring about righteousness. It causes me to say things I regret, or worse yet, to more easily give into anger the next time which lends to general grumpiness and a bad mood. No husband wants to come home to a wife like that!

And Lewis certainly does not intend to hurt me or cause me harm. He just knows that for whatever reason, green beans are not as tasty as they once were, and if that's his choice, he might rather not eat. It should be no surprise that throwing Cheerios all over the floor is tons of fun too, right?

It also occurs to me that this is not the worst phase we will go through in parenting. Lewis is not even talking yet! I realize that by choosing to let the Spirit live through me in these encounters now, it will be easier as time goes on to react well when difficult situations arise. My friend, Heather Morozov, always says you have to pick your battles, and I'm learning now which things are big enough to fight for, and which ones to let go of for the moment. Either way, anger does not accomplish anything good.

I write this almost reluctantly, trusting that there are others who struggle with this kind of thing. You don't have to confess it here if you do, but just know you're not alone! No one is ever going to be perfect in any area. I'm sure more failures will come for me in this, but we should strive to to overcome our sinful tendencies through the power of the Spirit. Thank God we don't have to do it alone!

the dangers of hand sanitizer

My sister sent me this link at snopes.com to some info about kids who have gotten "drunk" after licking hand sanitizer off their hands. Lots of people use this stuff these days, and a lot of it smells rather appetizing.....so pass the word to help other parents avoid these kind of terrifying experiences.

children and church

"Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another--and all the more as you see the Day approaching." --Hebrews 10:23-25

Lately it seems that many of the people in my life are struggling with "church." Justin and I are no different, unfortunately, as we are currently without a church home. We really don't expect to find the perfect church, but really desire to worship and serve, and impact our community, while still being challenged to practically apply God's Word to our lives everyday. And we want fellowship with others who are also striving to live holy lives. It seems simple enough!

But then there is another factor that we must consider as well. We want to find a place where Lewis will have every opporunity to encounter the Lord too, and where he can grow up learning about Jesus and how to walk with him.

So, knowing that we are not alone, my hope is to hear from some of you through this "survey" about how others deal with this issue. If you would rather not share your identity, that is fine. You can always leave a comment anonymously on this blog. The easiest way to participate is to copy (CTRL C/APPLE C) these questions and paste (CTRL V) them into the comments spot. I'm really not fishing for right answers here, just wanting to learn from you.

1--Name (OPTIONAL)
2--Your kids' ages (OPTIONAL)
3--Many of you have moved recently or changed churches. How has having children affected the whole process of finding a church home?
4--How has having children impacted your church attendance? Are you more regular, less regular or about the same and why?
5--How do you feel about church nurseries? Do you use them, like them etc.? If you have put your children in a nursery at some point, describe your experience--good, bad etc.
6--How has the church been a source of encouragement to you as parents?
7--Complete the statement- "In the area of ministry to parents and/or children, I wish my church would __________ ."
8--Do you have any advice for young parents regarding church involvement?

Thanks!

top names of 2006

This came from www.ivillage.com:

Here are the top 10 boys and girls names for 2006:

To see how popular your name or kids' names are go to the Social Security Administration's website.

do not fear

"Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."--Joshua 1:8-9

Fear is a very odd thing. It feels like it comes up when you least expect it, and it can terribly disturb our very lives. Women are certainly more prone to fear than men are, or maybe it is another kind of fear. Men fear failure and letting others down. Women fear physical harm and often various irrational things that have only a slight chance of ever occurring. We fear spiders, thunderstorms, and the unknown. Motherhood brings a whole new group of fears. We worry about our pregnancies, and keeping the babies inside us safe. We worry about the delivery of those babies. Then when they are here we worry about so many aspects of their little lives and anything that might get in the way of a normal existence. It is easy to let fear consume us if we are not careful.

This week there have been several scary things happen that brought fear into our home. The first, a mouse, was relatively harmless. Still, when I found several ketchup packets torn to shreds in one of our kitchen drawers I felt violated, in a way, that there was an uninvited guest rummaging through our things. When I saw the little guy, I was not terrified like the first time I saw a mouse in our home (just after we got married). But this time, as a mom, it upset me that a dirty creature was spreading his germs around our kitchen. My hero, Justin, set a trap that night and the next morning our mouse was no longer an issue!

A few days later, Justin was working in the evening, as he does two nights a week. I had put Lewis to bed around 9 p.m., but he was having trouble falling to sleep for some reason, and I had been in and out of his room a number of times when I heard a knock at the door. We do not have any way to see people without opening the door, and since we never have random people stop by after dark, I was immediately worried about who it might be. I called Justin and asked if he knew of anyone who might be coming by. He said that I should just ask, "Who's there" if the knocking continued.

Well, sure enough, a few minutes later, there was another knock, and with my phone in hand, I asked, "Who is it?" I must've asked loudly about three times before I heard a man respond, "It's your next door neighbor." That did not help me at all! Some people just moved out on one side of us, but why would a new neighbor choose this time of night to introduce himself? So I asked, "Can I help you with something?" He said, "I just wanted to ask you a question." Still skeptical, I said, "I'm in the middle of putting my son to bed right now." He said okay, and a few minutes later I heard a car pull away out on the street.

A few days have gone by now, and our 'neighbor' has not returned to ask his question, which leaves me to my original theory that this was someone with malicious intent looking for a naive person to open their door to a stranger. I have prayed for our protection many times since then. The thought that someone could harm me is scary enough, but my blood boils when I think someone may want to harm my child.

Still, I've heard on a number of occasions that the most repeated command in scripture is 'Do not fear' or 'Do not be afraid.' It helps me to realize that God is my protector and my refuge. He is able to see all those things and/or people who could potentially bring me harm. And yet, time and again, he asks me to trust him, and to take shelter in him. Whether your fear comes from spiders, mice, or mysterious knocks in the night, the Lord is with you wherever you go. It doesn't mean that nothing bad will ever happen. I have to remind myself that if he allows harm to come to my family, that it is not random, but that he has a specific purpose in mind for every trial that comes our way. Worrying about it only locks me into a prison of fear that I cannot escape on my own. That's not to say that I don't have moments when I am afraid, but God consistently provides comfort, and a way out from dwelling on that fear.